She was 15 years old when she found out that she would never be able to create life. How could this be, she was a young woman, uterus bearing creature created to help keep the species alive, what could have been the issue and why was she being punished? After all, she did not ask that man to forcefully take what was not given to him. She didn't ask to be left alone with this creep who found her diminutive sculpture to be this irresistible.
There she was, a virgin and proud. The last in her school, so it seemed and excited to start this new job helping people begin their journeys to sobriety. Soup kitchens, shelters, prisons, it didn't matter, she would talk to and help this people with enthusiasm and vigor to achieve sobriety. The man she worked with was one that the family called Uncle So and So. How would they know that this fictive kin member brewed a malice in his heart that would only be found out that one faithful day.
She gleamed at the idea that he found her to be so helpful and good at her job. She reveled in the notion that it couldn't get done without her. She looked at Uncle So and So with such admiration because he made these people's dreams come true at any cost. Little did she know that she would soon become another victim in the front that he put on as Good Samaritan.
Back at the church where his company's office was based out of she sat writing her notes for the day, to hand in. This bright eyed bushy tailed junior in high school was elated about the three people that she had convinced to give themselves a chance by entering 28 day rehabs to kick cocaine, alcohol and heroin. The lights shut as her adored boss Uncle So and So approached her from behind. She asked why the lights had been turned off and before she would utter the word off, she felt the warm tingling sensation of a hand across the left side of her face. To the floor she fell wondering why she was now being mauled. She fought with all her might but this three time felon, with the strength of ten men was too much for her to get away from. She struggled and struggled until her now limp body was being violated in ways that she had only seen on an occasional movie. Her cries or help as her virginity was being taken from her went unheard in the top floor church office. For so long she questioned what kind of God would allow for this to happen to her after all that her minor 15 years of life had already dealt her.
Those words were the worst that she could hear in that doctors office after her six day hospital stay, escaping ICU after the first two. "I'm sorry Ms. ,,, but due to the scar tissue, you will not be able to have children". She sorrowfully cried at the thought of not being able to bring God's gifts into the world on her own. She did not know that there was a miracle in store for her.
Over the next decade in a half God blessed her with three beautiful and loving relationships, none of which were able to produce the miracle of childbirth that she had secretly longed for. Her college love, patient and kind; her post college love, experienced and true; and her subsequent relationship honorable and masculine were never enough to create precious life. She had given up and began to live life for the moment, for she didn't have to worry about being tied down with her own children. She could come and go as she pleased and give all of that love to her Godchildren that blessed her life. Her next relationship was based on pure fun, after all, she worked hard had a demanding career and felt like she could take the break from ensuring a possible father and giving husband for a regular Joe who presented something different to her life. Their chemistry was remarkable. Their love...epic! She had no idea what was to occur.
Along with fun and different came drama and fatigue from a man that had unpacked baggage. She ignored the signs because the world looked in on their love and saw brilliance. They didn't quite understand this match but it worked for them. Two years into this steamy romance, was the first sign of morning sickness, fatigue and lightheadedness. Oh my..."could this be true?" She was pregnant. For the first time in thirty years, she had conceived! What a joyous occasion...until she lost that baby to a miscarriage six weeks later. Given all the signs that perhaps this, at once a blissful pair, may not survive the drama from his needy, troublemaking ex, they tried again...a month later the jackpot was hit again with more morning sickness and a positive home pregnancy test, a celebration was in order. After arriving to the first scheduled appointment, she was not allowed to leave the hospital...her little baby was in her tube and about to wreak havoc on mommies life. Another disappointment broke her heart. Another 8 weeks later, oil struck the Texan uterus again, joy, joy and more joy until the sorrowful morning when she lost her third baby via miscarriage.
She had given up...they had given up. How much more could she endure she thought? How much longer must her light shine before it is just extinguished altogether? That morning she woke up feeling nauseous, there was almost no excitement that she could muster up. In fact, she nearly threw the digital home pregnancy test clear across her 7 bedroom home, hoping that it would shatter into many pieces after it shared its positive sign with her! Why was God playing these practical jokes on her she wondered??? Why would He be so cruel??? She shared the news with her partner of her now tormented relationship. Surprisingly, he made her feel good about this and they celebrated...Celebrated with a strip tease that ended with her being upside down and right side left. There was the passion that they had shared for nearly three years, before all of the desperate dagger throwing from his Ex began; before she found out about the other women and before she stopped trusting this man. It was phenomenal, they made love alllll night long. In ways they never had before.
His screeching tires pulled up in front of the hospital, she couldn't move, agonizing pain prevented her from having consciousness and he was even scared that next morning. He didn't understand what type of pain caused her to nearly convulse as he raced her to the hospital at top speed. They explained to the Attending's that she had just found out that she was pregnant and that it was the fourth pregnancy in the last six months. That she had already had one in her tube that nearly ruptured and that the couple was scared that she may be bleeding internally from another ectopic pregnancy gone terribly wrong. The doctors of the posh hospital did all they could to immediately find out what was going on...190 beats per minute, securely inside the uterus there laid a miracle on its way. Her baby was not lost this time, it was not in her tubes and she could finally hear a heartbeat from her body that was not her own. They successfully implanted the seeds of life in the right spot to ten months later be her very first child and his very first daughter.
Oh, that pain that she felt... a ruptured vessel on her abdomen, probably from all that celebratory positioning the couple shared. She is now the proud mother of a beautiful baby girl that has, this far, brought her a years' worth of shear bliss and joy. She never imagined a life being so fulfilled as it has been over the last year. The baby broke her tailbone in the delivery room, where her baby girl was born to finger popping nurses and doctors, where Maxwel soulful melody filled the air and Miracle's were created.
Strength and patience will help you to endure the most trying of situations. You deserve happiness so never give up on life, love or yourself. Stay Blessed, yours truly...
Tuesday 12 July 2011
Ten Tips on Creating a Successful Health and Wellness Plan
Are you ready to shed some pounds and get into shape? Did your New Year's resolution fizzle out before the end of January? Don't worry, success will be yours in no time. Here are some tips that will get you back on track.
Start Your Plan Because YOU Want To
Your success rate will multiply exponentially if it's a plan that YOU want to do. If you feel like you NEED to do it, or HAVE to do it, then chances are you're not going to do well. You really need to W-A-N-T to make the changes. You need to feel that it's the right time...and that your heart is in it.
Find a Food Plan That Works for You
Hate counting calories? Then find a plan that doesn't ask you to do that. Want a very structured plan? Then perhaps a plan like NutriSystem or Jenny Craig is best for you. They give you the food to eat which makes it really convenient. However...there's a cost to convenience. I REALLY hate counting calories so I'm on a low-carb diet that requires NO COUNTING. I simply eat the foods that are on the "accepted" list. For me, that works great.
Choose an Exercise Program that You'll Stick With
Do you feel uncomfortable working out in front of other people? Then skip the gym membership and opt for an in-home program. You don't need to spend lots of money on equipment, either. A set of dumbells and an exercise DVD may be the only tools you'll need. Walking is a super-great way to get your heart rate up. All you need is a comfortable pair of shoes and some pavement.
Realize That You're Going to Have Setbacks
Get it through your head: you're going to have days (maybe several days) that you 'fall off the wagon' and feel that you've failed. It will happen. And that's okay. Knowing that there will be bad days makes it easier to dust yourself off and get back on track.
Share Your Goals with Someone
Tell your husband, wife, significant other, best friend, etc., that you're on a mission to improve your health. Let them be a support group for you. But DON'T allow them to pull you down and cause you to quit. Choose your allies carefully. They should be people who will help cheer you on.
Give Yourself A Break!
When you feel like you're not making much progress, it might be time for a short break. Give yourself a day or two to reflect on your progress. Feel good about how far you've come. What worked? Capitalize on that. What hasn't worked? No need to repeat those actions.
Document Your Journey
One of the best things I've done on my current health and wellness plan is to blog about it. I chose the free and easy-to-use platform called Tumblr. Signing up only takes a few seconds. The Health and Fitness section is full of some of the most wonderful, supportive people I've ever met. They have been there for me in the good times and bad. I truly owe a large part of my success to the Tumblr community.
Don't Quit!
The only way you'll fail is if you quit. So don't! Taking small steps in the right direction will get you where you want to be. Don't expect dramatic changes overnight. Instead, opt for a 'slow and steady wins the race' attitude. Rapid weight loss is not a healthy approach. Working out to the point of injury is not smart. Baby steps, people. Baby steps.
Sometimes You Need a Nudge
Remember that support group I mentioned? Give them the okay to push you along when you need it. (Trust me, you'll need it from time to time.) Keep them updated on your progress. Be honest with them. Tell them when things aren't going so well. Let them help push you back on track.
Pay It Forward: Help Someone Else
Sometimes the best form of motivation comes when you help someone else along the way. Showing them that they can do it, reinforces the fact that YOU can do it too.
Can you start an improvment plan and make it stick? You bet you can. Chart your course, stay consistent and share your journey with others. Success will be yours!
Start Your Plan Because YOU Want To
Your success rate will multiply exponentially if it's a plan that YOU want to do. If you feel like you NEED to do it, or HAVE to do it, then chances are you're not going to do well. You really need to W-A-N-T to make the changes. You need to feel that it's the right time...and that your heart is in it.
Find a Food Plan That Works for You
Hate counting calories? Then find a plan that doesn't ask you to do that. Want a very structured plan? Then perhaps a plan like NutriSystem or Jenny Craig is best for you. They give you the food to eat which makes it really convenient. However...there's a cost to convenience. I REALLY hate counting calories so I'm on a low-carb diet that requires NO COUNTING. I simply eat the foods that are on the "accepted" list. For me, that works great.
Choose an Exercise Program that You'll Stick With
Do you feel uncomfortable working out in front of other people? Then skip the gym membership and opt for an in-home program. You don't need to spend lots of money on equipment, either. A set of dumbells and an exercise DVD may be the only tools you'll need. Walking is a super-great way to get your heart rate up. All you need is a comfortable pair of shoes and some pavement.
Realize That You're Going to Have Setbacks
Get it through your head: you're going to have days (maybe several days) that you 'fall off the wagon' and feel that you've failed. It will happen. And that's okay. Knowing that there will be bad days makes it easier to dust yourself off and get back on track.
Share Your Goals with Someone
Tell your husband, wife, significant other, best friend, etc., that you're on a mission to improve your health. Let them be a support group for you. But DON'T allow them to pull you down and cause you to quit. Choose your allies carefully. They should be people who will help cheer you on.
Give Yourself A Break!
When you feel like you're not making much progress, it might be time for a short break. Give yourself a day or two to reflect on your progress. Feel good about how far you've come. What worked? Capitalize on that. What hasn't worked? No need to repeat those actions.
Document Your Journey
One of the best things I've done on my current health and wellness plan is to blog about it. I chose the free and easy-to-use platform called Tumblr. Signing up only takes a few seconds. The Health and Fitness section is full of some of the most wonderful, supportive people I've ever met. They have been there for me in the good times and bad. I truly owe a large part of my success to the Tumblr community.
Don't Quit!
The only way you'll fail is if you quit. So don't! Taking small steps in the right direction will get you where you want to be. Don't expect dramatic changes overnight. Instead, opt for a 'slow and steady wins the race' attitude. Rapid weight loss is not a healthy approach. Working out to the point of injury is not smart. Baby steps, people. Baby steps.
Sometimes You Need a Nudge
Remember that support group I mentioned? Give them the okay to push you along when you need it. (Trust me, you'll need it from time to time.) Keep them updated on your progress. Be honest with them. Tell them when things aren't going so well. Let them help push you back on track.
Pay It Forward: Help Someone Else
Sometimes the best form of motivation comes when you help someone else along the way. Showing them that they can do it, reinforces the fact that YOU can do it too.
Can you start an improvment plan and make it stick? You bet you can. Chart your course, stay consistent and share your journey with others. Success will be yours!
Musings of an Independent Nature
Independence Day is one of the few holidays I respect, as it was not created merely to stimulate the economy, as were many of the modern days on the calendar we are told are "special". As such I'd like to pay it the honor of recognition. In doing so, today's group of pearls will walk a very dangerous line, as they deal primarily with two subjects that are often unwise to discuss (especially together), i.e. politics and religion. It is generally considered to be unwise because no other subjects arouse as much passion, or as much anger as do these two when the proponents of one or another creed feels challenged by the beliefs of another.
However, lest we forget, the first, and perhaps the most important, of the reasons we fought to be free of English rule was religious freedom; our entire government is based on the principle of separation of church and state. Too often today, those who would call themselves patriots are in reality interested only in preserving their own religious beliefs, and would deny to others the same prerogative. July 4th, to my way of thinking, is a day to celebrate the diversity of thought allowed by the Constitution, to honor Truth in whatever guise it may take. I find it immensely interesting, and satisfying to note that the quotes I've chosen are the thoughts of people from a variety of different periods in our history, but all are alike in their intransigent resistance to any limits of thought or choice..
o forestall any flaming responses, or misunderstanding, I will also state at his point, that just because I have included a pearl, doesn't necessarily mean that I endorse the same ideas. It also doesn't mean that I don't; as a matter of fact, I agree with most of what follows. But most is not all, and as far as my own thoughts, they are my own, and I've learned not to share all of them with others, as they have a tendency to make folks uneasy, or even angry. That is unfortunate, but there it is; human nature, being what it is, always has the tendency to "shoot the messenger". I don't mind; it keeps me on my toes......meantime, enjoy now these statements of belief by a number of important historical figures, and others.......
"But the greatest of all reformers of the depraved religion of his own country was Jesus of Nazareth. Abstracting what is really his from the rubbish in which it is buried, easily distinguished by its luster from the dross of his biographers, and as separable as the diamond from the dunghill, we have the outlines of a system of the most sublime morality which has ever fallen from the lips of man; outlines which it is lamentable he did not live to fill up... The establishment of the innocent and genuine character of this benevolent moralist, and the rescuing it from the imputation of imposture, which has resulted from artificial systems*, invented by ultra-Christian sects, unauthorized by a single word ever uttered by him, is a most desirable object... *e.g. The immaculate conception of Jesus, his deification, the creation of the world by him, his miraculous powers, his resurrection and visible ascension, his corporeal presence in the Eucharist, the Trinity; original sin, atonement, regeneration, election, orders of Hierarchy, etc." -- Thomas Jefferson, Letter to William Short, October 31 (Halloween), 1819
"Democracy is the art and science of running the circus from the monkey cage." -- H. L. Mencken (1810-1956)
"However, on religious issues there can be little or no compromise. There is no position on which people are so immovable as their religious beliefs. There is no more powerful ally one can claim in a debate than Jesus Christ, or God, or Allah, or whatever one calls this supreme being. But like any powerful weapon, the use of God's name on one's behalf should be used sparingly. The religious factions that are growing throughout our land are not using their religious clout with wisdom. They are trying to force government leaders into following their position 100 percent. If you disagree with these religious groups on a particular moral issue, they complain, they threaten you with a loss of money or votes or both. I'm frankly sick and tired of the political preachers across this country telling me as a citizen that if I want to be a moral person, I must believe in "A," "B," "C," and "D." Just who do they think they are? And from where do they presume to claim the right to dictate their moral beliefs to me? And I am even more angry as a legislator who must endure the threats of every religious group who thinks it has some God-granted right to control my vote on every roll call in the Senate. I am warning them today: I will fight them every step of the way if they try to dictate their moral convictions to all Americans in the name of "conservatism."" -- Senator Barry Goldwater, from the Congressional Record, September 16, 1981"You know your country is dying when you have to make a distinction between what is moral and ethical, and what is legal." -- John De Armond, Performance Engineering Magazine, 1994
"I'm completely in favor of the separation of Church and State. My idea is that these two institutions screw us up enough on their own, so both of them together is certain death." -- George Carlin"They [the clergy] believe that any portion of power confided to me will be exerted in opposition to their schemes. And they believe rightly: for I have sworn upon the altar of God eternal hostility against every form of tyranny over the mind of man."-- Thomas Jefferson to Dr. Benjamin Rush, September 23, 1800
"The superior man thinks always of virtue; the common man thinks of comfort." -- Confucius (B.C. 551-479)
There you have it...a veritable orgy of ideas, to do with as you please. But take a moment today to think about the historical forces that have led us to the situation we have in the world today, and strengthen your resolve to maintain that freedom that our forefathers left us as their legacy. You honor that legacy when you bend your efforts to use the mind you have been given, and reject outright any and all attempts to curtail, predjudice, or control that mind. Y'all take care out there....and have a good Fourth!....
However, lest we forget, the first, and perhaps the most important, of the reasons we fought to be free of English rule was religious freedom; our entire government is based on the principle of separation of church and state. Too often today, those who would call themselves patriots are in reality interested only in preserving their own religious beliefs, and would deny to others the same prerogative. July 4th, to my way of thinking, is a day to celebrate the diversity of thought allowed by the Constitution, to honor Truth in whatever guise it may take. I find it immensely interesting, and satisfying to note that the quotes I've chosen are the thoughts of people from a variety of different periods in our history, but all are alike in their intransigent resistance to any limits of thought or choice..
o forestall any flaming responses, or misunderstanding, I will also state at his point, that just because I have included a pearl, doesn't necessarily mean that I endorse the same ideas. It also doesn't mean that I don't; as a matter of fact, I agree with most of what follows. But most is not all, and as far as my own thoughts, they are my own, and I've learned not to share all of them with others, as they have a tendency to make folks uneasy, or even angry. That is unfortunate, but there it is; human nature, being what it is, always has the tendency to "shoot the messenger". I don't mind; it keeps me on my toes......meantime, enjoy now these statements of belief by a number of important historical figures, and others.......
"But the greatest of all reformers of the depraved religion of his own country was Jesus of Nazareth. Abstracting what is really his from the rubbish in which it is buried, easily distinguished by its luster from the dross of his biographers, and as separable as the diamond from the dunghill, we have the outlines of a system of the most sublime morality which has ever fallen from the lips of man; outlines which it is lamentable he did not live to fill up... The establishment of the innocent and genuine character of this benevolent moralist, and the rescuing it from the imputation of imposture, which has resulted from artificial systems*, invented by ultra-Christian sects, unauthorized by a single word ever uttered by him, is a most desirable object... *e.g. The immaculate conception of Jesus, his deification, the creation of the world by him, his miraculous powers, his resurrection and visible ascension, his corporeal presence in the Eucharist, the Trinity; original sin, atonement, regeneration, election, orders of Hierarchy, etc." -- Thomas Jefferson, Letter to William Short, October 31 (Halloween), 1819
"Democracy is the art and science of running the circus from the monkey cage." -- H. L. Mencken (1810-1956)
"However, on religious issues there can be little or no compromise. There is no position on which people are so immovable as their religious beliefs. There is no more powerful ally one can claim in a debate than Jesus Christ, or God, or Allah, or whatever one calls this supreme being. But like any powerful weapon, the use of God's name on one's behalf should be used sparingly. The religious factions that are growing throughout our land are not using their religious clout with wisdom. They are trying to force government leaders into following their position 100 percent. If you disagree with these religious groups on a particular moral issue, they complain, they threaten you with a loss of money or votes or both. I'm frankly sick and tired of the political preachers across this country telling me as a citizen that if I want to be a moral person, I must believe in "A," "B," "C," and "D." Just who do they think they are? And from where do they presume to claim the right to dictate their moral beliefs to me? And I am even more angry as a legislator who must endure the threats of every religious group who thinks it has some God-granted right to control my vote on every roll call in the Senate. I am warning them today: I will fight them every step of the way if they try to dictate their moral convictions to all Americans in the name of "conservatism."" -- Senator Barry Goldwater, from the Congressional Record, September 16, 1981"You know your country is dying when you have to make a distinction between what is moral and ethical, and what is legal." -- John De Armond, Performance Engineering Magazine, 1994
"I'm completely in favor of the separation of Church and State. My idea is that these two institutions screw us up enough on their own, so both of them together is certain death." -- George Carlin"They [the clergy] believe that any portion of power confided to me will be exerted in opposition to their schemes. And they believe rightly: for I have sworn upon the altar of God eternal hostility against every form of tyranny over the mind of man."-- Thomas Jefferson to Dr. Benjamin Rush, September 23, 1800
"The superior man thinks always of virtue; the common man thinks of comfort." -- Confucius (B.C. 551-479)
There you have it...a veritable orgy of ideas, to do with as you please. But take a moment today to think about the historical forces that have led us to the situation we have in the world today, and strengthen your resolve to maintain that freedom that our forefathers left us as their legacy. You honor that legacy when you bend your efforts to use the mind you have been given, and reject outright any and all attempts to curtail, predjudice, or control that mind. Y'all take care out there....and have a good Fourth!....
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